HIGH FASHION
- Revisited -
Many many people (3) have
complained to me about the lack of attention I’ve been giving this section. So
here are some new outfits and reviews. I’ve reversed the chronological order
for you poor poor non-broadband surfers.
In the wee hours of one morning just before work, I
reached into the closet and pulled out an outfit. It had a bear on the fanny
and matched the decor of our house pretty well, perfect selection I thought.
Upon inserting the baby into it, the absolute unacceptability of the wardrobe choice
became very evident. It looked like it was missing a Yukon Gold (potato) logo.
It's wide enough that you could hold a daycare in there by cramming in a dozen
kids or so. It's too wide, too loose, too baggy. Then there's the socks. Although not part of this outfit, they do
nothing for it except worsen the over all look. Come one?! Is 'HE' supposed to
look like a kilted school girl with knee highs? Nope.
In the end, if it wasn't for the cute butt bear,
this outfit would be getting a ZERO. As it is, we can give it 1 star, strictly
for the effort.
FASHION RATING: ¶««««
When you go out you need to dress like a million bux. Well at walmart they had
this outfit on sale for only $9.98. It has a certain je-ne-se-pas.
It’s both elegant and comfortable. Whether you choose to go panted or pantless it’s a hit. While out you can take in an opera or
a late night matinee. Either way the outfit will suit the situation. As per
usual, socks and/or shoes are optional but consider the socks as a late night
snack if the evening runs past 8:00pm. A truly great find for
both boys and cross gender dressing girls. For its versatility and great
value we’re giving it a perfect score.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶¶¶
What looks like it took months and months to make
actually took only an afternoon for Grandma (not Matthew’s grandma). The neck
hole had to be adjusted to compensate for Matthew’s ginormous
Polack head. It’s full of brains so it grows extra large. This is an absolutely
adorable outfit. Great for just sitting around or cruisin around breaking daddy’s stuff. Perfect
score.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶¶¶
SCENERIO: 45min til
bedtime. At the last meal the daytime outfit was destroyed with Cheerios slurry
and cookie crumbs. The clothes must be removed so the particles do not get ground
into the rugs. What do you do? EASY. Strip the baby
down to his diaper and for the remaining ¾ of the hour have him wear the
stylish Tigger housecoat. It’s clean, cozy and covers
up the baby enough for
pre-bedtime activities.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶¶«
Lest we forget the Birthday suit? Overall the outfit doesn’t work. There are baggy
sections under the arms, it’s a bit too pale in colour for the season and there
seems to be a big tear on the lower backside. With only folds to house money
and other essentials the lack of utilitarian accessories such as pockets scores
this outfit pretty low. It does score a few points for it durability and scrubability. It’s self cleaning so it cannot be
permanently stained. Great for sleeping in but you wouldn’t wear it to Walmart.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶«««
An excellent example how the
right accessory can make the outfit work. Rim up, says “hey baby I’m a sailor”. Rim down, “hey baby wanna go get lost in the woods”? Either way you’ll be
carried home by someone for sure that night.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶¶«
(No hat)
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶¶¶
(With hat)
Denim overalls and a flannel
shirt. “I am Canadian”. Perfect
score.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶¶¶
An outfit says a lot about a man. In a high-pitched
lisp this one says: “Hey big boy... I’m a Seamen”
Combine that with the Friar-Tuck hair style and he’s ready for his stay at the
YMCA.
FASHION RATING: ¶««««
There are subtle differences between these images.
If you did not notice, in the one on the left the baby bears the “I Love Mommy”
bib and on the Right the “I Love Daddy” bib. If you
examine even closer you will see that the baby is much happier in the “Daddy”
bib vs. the “Mommy” bib. Also note that the “O” in the word LOVE on Daddy’s bib
is spelled with a heart, whereas Mommy’s LOVE is spelled with the number ZERO.
There is NO contest here. Daddy bib rocks!
MOMMY BIB: ¶¶¶¶«
DADDY BIB: ¶¶¶¶¶
Who let the dogs out?! Woof Woof
Woof. A contender for the Worst Dressed List of 2004,
this “doggie” outfit really does suck. The sheer fact that the dog’s head is
bigger than the baby’s makes it hard to concentrate when having a face-to-face
conversation. Do you look into the baby’s eyes or the doggie’s eyes when
speaking? There are dominant personality issues here, one trying to outshine
the other. This confusion scores this wear at the bottom of our fashion list.
FASHION RATING: ¶««««
Grrrrrrr I’m a bear. And as seen by the lovely smirk a definite
winner. The outfit works in any setting but it lost some points for the yellow
socks. Soft to the touch and has an easy access flap to the poop chute making
it a parent’s dream. How can any baby be unhappy wearing such a cute and
adorable pair of threads?
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶««
Checkers anyone? This rare find from the Goodwill
store scores high on the comfort scale but low on style. The little yellow
skinned bears just bring back bad memories of the jaundice (Hyperbilirubinemia) days. Nice for lounging around the house but let’s
not wear it out to the local Walmart.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶«««
This little ensemble shows off the baby’s high
sense of style and exceptional colour coordination. The home-boy hat is cocked slightly
to his left indicating the he is “down” with the West Side Pampers. For a walk
in the park on a brisk day or for just sitting around crapping in your pants,
this outfit is sure to attract the snootiest of hunnies.
FASHION RATING: ¶¶¶¶«
» HOME
PAGE «